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Monday, October 13, 2008

In sickness and health..

I think I know why I got sick. As I could sense that lately I have accummulated some fats all over me (hahah.. a very honest way of putting things here), I decided to pay the gym a visit last Friday (after 2 months' break), I believe I did not do the warming up long enough. Then, an instructor came by and convinced me to weigh myself. The result was not so pleasing, thus I decided to hit for the weights. After the whole ordeal of exercising, steaming (the fats away?) and taking cold shower, I could feel that something was wrong with me. My nerves felt raw, like the meat at the butcher's. Sigh..the things that I'll do to look good.

Now, the notion of looking good is very subjective. I believe it all depends on one's motivation. Why do some women take this thing seriously and some don't? Someone used to tell me that as a wife, one ought to look presentable to her husband..and to those around him. Hahahaha, surprised? The rational being, men love it when his buddies compliment on their wives. Like trophy wives, I suppose. Perhaps that explains why we see old fellas clinging to beautiful lasses.

Well, as I was lying down on the bed in the hospital, waiting for the result of my blood test, my mind drifted into an imaginary pathetic scene...

The test result proved that I have one of those dreaded diseases, thus my days are numbered. The problem is that I won't just die instantly, but I would have to go through the curse of being bed ridden. Consequently, I will change into a haggard and fussy sick lady. My life would be filled with all sorts of medication to ease the pain, not to cure it. So I guess, what's the point of shoving those dreadful things into my throat, thus due to this, I will be complaining and fussing about it.

As I have to go through such dreadful ordeal, my physique changes to the worst. My skin dries out and darkens, my eyes become dull and lifeless, my hair as brittle as the 'berus sabut' and so on and so forth...

The saddest thing will be is when I have to witness how my loved ones will have to care for me. How they have to endure such dreadful experience to nurse this terminally ill woman. I wonder how would my hubby take it? Would he still be there by my side till the end? How if he finds someone else to fill in his empty heart before I ever say goodbye forever? God knows how lonely this heart is going to be, having to wait at the door of Death.

My kids..yeah, how are they going to take it? They are too young to be motherless. What if they have a new one to take over my place, would she be as nice as Maria Von Trapp, filling in their young hearts with the sound of music? Since women are prone to imagine the worst, so I figure I have to go along with the nightmare..What if that new woman is an abusive one, the typical evil step mother? Oh no..

Suddenly I startled..my hubby was tugging at my arm. He wondered why I was crying in my sleep. I was speechless but glad it was just a dream. Gosh, it felt so real.

The blood test indicates that I am ok. The pain in my so called ovary (actually not there) was because of some sort of infection of my urinary tract because I have not been drinking enough water lately. The fever was due to the insufficient warming up at the gym..yeah, funny. Nevertheless, thank you God.

Out of curiosity, on our way home, I asked my hubby of his reaction, if the blood test brought in bad news. Thank God, he said he'll care for me till the end, as this would be his gesture to appreciate all the things I have done for the family. Then, I told him about the physical changes that I might have to go through due to the sickness. I illustrated to him how my skin will become oily and wrinkled, my boobs will sag to the floor, my hair will become dry and brittle, my lips become parched and darken and so on..

He paused for a good 2 minutes and at last replied, "I am sure you won't look as dreadful as that, you know my friends would be visiting you every now and then, so I am sure you want to look presentable to them, don't you?". I smiled at him. Yeah..trophy wife. I rest my case.


Kak Teh said...

Hi Ida, came to your blog via Sharon's. haha, yes, we can be quite a drama queen, even when its just a headache.
Take care.

lenzaidi said...

there you are Kak Teh.On my blog hopping/blogging spree last night to find out who/what GUIT is i bumped upon your blog.I click on for about good hour i finally got to know you are actually the Zaharah of BBC,London.I could imagine both, you and hubby could pass as a beautiful young couple, whom made good in the city of London.AG is still although grey striking, tall, dark and good looking fella. And no one upon reading your blog would find trouble befriending your good self.Welcome to Ida Hariati blog,the blog we pen down about any matters to our heart;-).

And woman,
for once i really thought you are in some kinda medical threshold. With that beautiful little ones and the unfold dreams you have, dont you ever think otherwise lol.

True to Kak Teh's word, we can be quite a drama queen.Ney, at this age Kak Teh, i can never be one anymore, it only happened a few time ;-).
Cheers bah.

Kak Teh said...

lenzaidi, (tumpang lalu, ya, tuanrumah) yes, I am indeed the person you described ex of BBC, but tu masa muda dulu.
Tapi tak aci laaa, I cant access your blog!
I will certainly be coming back..hehe, tuanrumah tak jemput pun!

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

La...sorry tuan rumah baru balik pegi cat umah baru...hahaha. I am truly honoured to have you ladies here.

My postings are just my humble view about life. Saya budak masih belajar, so I guess I need to learn loads of things from you.

Yeah, I am a drama queen sometimes..I'm lying, all the time! I hope it is not a sickness, as I know no man could stand a drama queen in his life. We as ladies have to keep cool as our men actually rely on us!

Take care.

Lyana Mauseth said...

dear ida...i ingat i sorang je yg selalu dream benda pelik2 snd cry in my sleep...paling teruk 5 years ago, i dreamt my hamster mati..tersedu2 i nangis...tergejut yusuf..dah la masa tu kat hotel klia sbb terlepas flight balik sini..stranded 4 hari...

i pun selalu jgk fikir if anything happen to me, mcmana la ank2 i...last saturday, the wife to yusuf's cousin died of cancer in london..i can't imagine la how he will live without her since they have known each other since they were young...

Lyana Mauseth said...

ida, i reti la buat playlist tu..dah try byk kali x menjadi haha...

btw, u nak tgk mimi punya blog? http://lil-n.blogspot.com/

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Dear Lyana,

Gamaknya minah Capricon macam kita ni memang agak drama queen kot. Anyway, kesian cousin Yusuf tu..ni buat i nak nangis ni, dia ada kids ke..kata kat dia kat Mesia ni ramai anak dara baik-baik boleh tolong jaga famili dia. Yusuf dah dapat sorang,(hang la tu..buat malu pulak..). Cancer apa Lyana? Cancer ni dia punya suffer teruk, kesian kan.

Yeah I dah jumpa Mimi's blog. Hopefully she still ingat me. Awat tak ingat, wedding dia dulu I pi apa.

Ok, it is getting late, I gotta sleep la..goodnight dear.:)

Lyana Mauseth said...

haha mmg la kot...u ingat intan kwn i tu? alah intan sabah tu? haaa dia pun kalau buat drama mmg nak gelak...nnt i cerita pnjg lebar..

sepupu dia tu ank dah besaq2 dah pun..51 yrs old, bini dia br 48 tau..kanser apa i tak sure sgt...kwn yusuf sorg lg pun meninggal sabtu lepas sbb kanser hati...kira minggu ni minggu sedih la

mimi ingat la kat u..mcmana la buleh lupa sebilik berapa tahun haha...dia ckp u makin lawa la...:D

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Dear Lyana,

Cancer is the killer for urban people like us. I believe it is in the food we eat, or perhaps the water we drink. If u makan ulam macam org kampung dulu, mana ada sakit teruk..

Mimi ada FB tak? I ni jarang pulak ke FB sebab saja nak hang around my blog just to write more. My writings tak le elok sgt, but I just wanna try.

U take care, ok..semalam i p beli ikan punya la mahal ikan kecik pun, teringat kat hang dapat ikan banyak..syoknya..

Take care

Mimi said...

Heloooo Lalingggg..off course la I still remember u..u, Suzali and your adorable kids (masa tu Sarah & Adam baru 2 org) came to my wedding @ TTDI...glad to meet you online [kiss-kiss-hug-hug]. Seriously girl, u still look gorgeous..tak mcm mak orang langsung. BTW, hari tu my hubby kata mcm nampak u & En Suzali di Uptown..betoikah itu kamu ber-2 or kamu ber-2 tidak pergi ke tempat2 sebegitu. Hubs aku rajin carik DVD cetak rompak situ daaa..dokek dgn rumah aku..hihi

Mimi said...

btw, glad to hear it's nothing serious. Suspense tau baca ur story ni. I miss your 'drama queening' (is there such a word aaa??)tehehe semasa jaman persekolahan dolu2..huhuh..those were the times where we will buy nasi bungkus @ the Hafsa's canteen and makan bersila mcm Hang Tuah 4 bersaudara (u, me, Lyana & Zeti) pastu borak @ our lil dining area cum ironing area cum cookimg area in our room? Rasa mcm aku dok ternampak2 je..the blue carpet (courtesy of ur mom), the Philips iron, the food rack (was it green) tempat letak our foodstuff ie. kicap cap kipas udang Zeti, biscuits etc, kasut bergelimpangan kat luar bilik...huhu..I wish I could turn back time and experience it all again (minus the classes la hihi)

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Hahahhah..Mimi memang sah the couple who ur husband saw at Uptown tengah malam buta tu, I ngan Suzalie. Alamak, terkantoi pulak we all tak pi semanyang terawih, but merambu sampai Bandar Sunway...hehehehe..Oh yes, the kids were at home with the maid.

Wah, Mr. Abd Kareem boleh kenai I walaupun berambut blonde sekarang ye..hahhahah.

Kirim salam kat dia..nanti house warming hang mai tau bwk semua orang, if dia ada arab UIA brothas pun boleh bawak...heheehhe

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Mimi ingat tak my black winter boots yang I beli kat Warsaw, with pig skin lining tu? Tak senonoh betoi ye, selamba je.

I ingat lagi when u said u dreamt of my feet being on fire because of the boots? Takut siut..

Lyana Mauseth said...

huhu i ingat la..rak mkanan tu mmg hijau sbb i yg beli (I kan suka ijau)..pastu kapet biru tu..biskut mark & spenser mimi..ida masak red bean haha...i ingat ur boots ida, u terus buang bila mimi told u about the dream haha...i pun pakai boots pig skin lining dah setahun baru perasan..terus buang kat salvation army...haha jgn lupa kalau i yg beli kicap, sure i balut tisu kat kepala dia sbb meluat tgk kicap tu meleleh kat tepi botol haha

rindu la kan life dulu2...mkn berjam2 x habis lagi...tp mimi dgn zeti la paling rajin p kelas..i dgn ida melepak je reja nya haha...ida, ingat tak kita selalu lmbt p kelas kopanski, bila kita masuk dia suruh bdk2 tepuk tangan haha..kopanski tu mmg la hati kering, dia ckp dia x suka kat i sbb i x pakai spek...ada ka...

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

hahhahah..but i believe among the 4 of us, I was the laziest bum when it comes to going to class..apa keja i hah..hang around kat library at my favourite spot, lepak kat cafe ngan geng 'international' i dulu..merapu betoi ye..

But my part of the room memang best tido, so cool...zzzzz. Lepas tu ada je org2 panggil i from luaq pagaq..ingat tak?

I really miss Prof Kopanski, he wrote to me less than 3 months ago, still in UIA, at the same room..I need to pay him a visit la..

How we have grown into full flegde women, each has a different story to tell. I do not want to turn back time, as I am happy with what I have now..kids especially.

Mimi said...

hihi..botol la kauu dengan suzali di uptown ye? seronok nyer dating ber-2 je :)
hubs kenal sgt sbb Suzali la. Tapi dia malu nak tegur sbb takut silap orang =..iyolah..tgk kauu dah blonde bagai..ihik..
Bila nak wat housewarming (ceh tak malu lak tanya)..jgn lupo invite..kalo after 31st oct takdo la Haji Kareem sobab dio nak balik Mokah..no haji Kareem..no brothas lorrr..hihih..u aaa..nak kena pukui sekali nih..still notty2 like b4..i miss u la laling..hihih..ur

pasai ur boots tu...myself and Zeti telah menangkut tanah kat belakang Hafsa sbb nak samak kaki kitorang..gatai sungguh kami pi try kasut hang tu masa hang takde kt bilik...teringin sebenarnya memakai boots..hihi

Lyana..hang kalo beli kicap mesti letak tisu paper kt tepi..aku baru tingat la..

As u said..kalo dpt turn back time pun just for a few moments je la..masa time kita makan2 kt situ..hihi. The rest tu aku xnak ulang balik..I'm happy with my life now..Alhamdulillah.

Lyana Mauseth said...

xnak le aku pegi zaman dedulu tu...tensen wooo...now idup dah stable, dah hepi...xnak la cr masalah lgi kan....setakat kenang2 gitu ja la, buat senyum sorg2 haha...bila rindu kwn2...huhu i kat sini xde kwn rapat..takat gitu2 je...it is not easy to make new friends, old friends are more comfortable kan...?

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

la..u all try my boots ke? hahahhha, apa la teringin sgt boots pig skin lining, merapu betoi la...hahhahahah.

Lyana, u tak ramai friends kat sana, but i believe life is superb over there, you are not apart of this crazy rat race in KL.

Sigh, have to go now..oh yes, i will invite all for the housewarming, don't worry. Bring along your swimming outfit, pelampung and all, boleh p swimming kat pool nanti..hahahah